The 30th Anniversary of me finishing high school was last November. I have a FEW friends from high school I keep in touch with, one helped me out against bullies a few times.

I don't think I'll go to the proposed school reunion for the simple reason that some people I don't like will be there. For one guy, if he came and he approached me, I'd have the confidence to say to him, and not under the influence of alcohol, "Look, I've got nothing to say to you, so don't come up to me and want to greet me like a buddy. Sure, I'll accept an apology for being a s**t, but that's as far as it goes."

I've only been able to face my old school in the past few years. I moved away geographically, but by chance, not long before I decided I wanted to come home, I bumped into a guy I went to school with, and him opening up about a vulnerability made passing by my old high school easier. At school, he wanted to be a vet, and when we did our work experience, he went to the RSPCA, and I went to the library. When I bumped into him later, he was studying engineering, and he told me that he decided he didn't want to work with abused animals. My late cat, Nutsy, was born into a house occupied by drug dealers and addicts (if I can infodump, they were a bit below the chain to Brian Geoffrey (Geoff) Shergold Chambers, hanged in Kuala Lumpur, on July 7, 1986, alongside his accomplice, Kevin Barlow (Chambers was an experienced drug trafficker, who was caught in Singapore with two vials of heroin in his jacket pocket and after convincing and bribing a customs official that they were for personal use, he was released. He had made the run a few times. Barlow was a small time marijuana smoker, who also drank heavily, and had little prospect of regular work, and Chambers' was able to recruit Barlow (the woman he lodged with was in a relationship with an associate) and he was interested in travelling and easy money. Barlow was spotted at the airport in Penang, shivering and sweating, and a police officer, having been tipped off, approached him. Karpal Singh defended Barlow (Frank Galbally later became involved). Malaysia has since softened its stance a little, with an Australian woman caught in possession of ice, who was sentenced to hang, on appeal from the prosecution, but subsequently acquitted. Anyway, they were going to, if they couldn't find a home for Nutsy and the other kittens in the litter, put him into a calico bag and drown him. My brother's ex-fiance got him for my brother, but she used to hit him on the head and throw him at waist height of kitchen benches and tables. With me, all Nutsy knew was love and kindness, and we rescued each other. He missed out on seeing abused animals not just survive but thrive once adopted and seeing progress reports. That made it easier for me to go past the school.

I would want to give a speech and say, "In the school magazine, it was suggested that I would be a human memory bank ten years on. Nine years after that, I was diagnosed as autistic, which explained a lot of why I was like I was. I didn't need some smart Alec to tell me that if I wanted to be more popular, I should grow my hair, do some other superficial crap and graffiti my schoolbag. I remember going on a road-trip with a couple, and my father would diligently check the oil and the water and tyres of his car, while the man of the other couple (I was 15 at the time) would have a cigarette, throw on the clothes he'd worn the day before, wash his face, wet his hair and run a comb through it, and kick his tyres and start the engine.