My father told me that when I was little, my maternal grandfather asked him if he'd started smacking me and if he didn't, my grandfather would. My father stood up to him and said, "You lay a finger on him and watch out!" My grandfather didn't mean, "Naughty! Naughty!" and a tap across the fingers, he meant, send him to his room and wait for him and belt him.

I remember when I was four, I had asthma, and my mother had to take me to the doctor and I couldn't communicate to the doctor that his stethoscope hurt because the weather was cold and the metal from the dome was cold and it hurt. (This was in 1979 and the stethoscope didn't have the rubber or plastic cover on the dome that most modern ones do) and my mother took me into my room, when we got home and belted me with a wooden spoon because I had a meltdown!

I had a meltdown in the waiting room when I was 12, because my mother knowingly and deliberately forced me to see a doctor I didn't like. Why I didn't like him can be explained with two analogies. The first of which is when I went on a road trip with my family, when I was 15, another couple came with us, and we took a caravan. The man of the couple had a 4WD like ours and he was trying to climb the Toowoomba Ranges in fifth gear while towing his caravan! I thought that diesel engines were weak, but the reason why he lost power was that he didn't downshift! How does this relate to the doctor? Well, he did a stomach exam and applied too much pressure and it hurt but what I couldn't communicate with him was that the way he was doing it hurt, not that I had a pain in the stomach. The second can best be put with the man two doors down from us, who was going to visit some relatives in NSW, and he had a 1988 Toyota Corolla 4WD wagon and a 1988 Ford Falcon. My father asked him which car they were taking and he said "the big one." Okay, the Falcon was automatic and the Corolla manual and his wife couldn't drive a manual and they were sharing the driving. My response would have also been the Falcon (if it had been mine, I would have had my mechanic fit KYB shock Absorbers at least to the rear) but because the Corolla 4WD was economical, but for a long drive, a bigger car is more comfortable. So, personality wise, this doctor and I were incompatible. He was a rough, tough sort of a guy, and I am more soft.

I wish I'd had an autistic mentor growing up as an autistic mentor could have had more patience to go with me to the doctor and the like.

I get that parents want what's best for their kids, but most often letting their kids be their authentic autistic selves is the best.