I, too, am an introspective person, and I remember being bullied and harassed at school by people asking a stupid question and giving a stupid response to my answer. They'd say, "Are you a boy or a girl?" I would, despite internal conflict, answer, "Boy," and they'd say, "Prove it." (i.e. expose your genitals).

The religious groups' take on existential matters is, "You were born this, so be this," without understanding that when a child is born, a doctor or nurse makes an assignment on the basis of genitalia, not personality. And the obstetrician who delivered me saw me when I was 21 days old and gave my mother some cream for a rash on my face and neck from a soap allergy, he didn't see me when I was four and hear that I liked playing in dolly corner and kitchen corner at kindergarten. He didn't see me at 12 and see that I liked subjects more popular amongst females.

I agree that we don't choose an identity, but when another person's idea of an identity is foisted upon us, discomfort arises.