I remember, when I was in Year Seven (I was 11 years old) a kid at school asked me if I masturbated. As someone who was kept in the dark, I thought the word sounded like something chooks did (I thought of it rhyming with incubate). I went home and told my mother that a kid had asked me this. She replied, "I hope you don't!" And I said to her, "I don't know what it means, so I don't know if I do it (subconsciously)." She replied, "It means play with yourself to make your woo-woo go hard." I said, "Well, no, I don't."

I didn't lose my virginity until I was 25, and I had premature ejaculation. My ex-girlfriend told me I couldn't satisfy her, and I rang a sexual health line, and spoke to a nurse who asked me, "Do you masturbate?" I said no, and that I didn't think I should, as I had a girlfriend. She said, "You'd be surprised at the number of people who are in relationships who do masturbate." My ex-girlfriend wanted an open relationship and I didn't. I know some people can find they work, but I say that it's guaranteed to hurt somebody.

One of the hardest things I had to deal with, as a young boy, was the fact that my mother had no patience with me of a morning. She couldn't (or rather, she didn't want to understand) that I can't just open my eyes and get straight out of bed. That is, unless I have come to the end of my natural amount of sleeping time. (So, if I lay down and sleep for 16 hours, I can open my eyes and take a few minutes to actually wake up, whereas if I'm in a deep sleep and I'm artificially woken up, it takes me longer. She would stand at the foot of my bed and snap at me to just open my eyes and get up. When I would snap back that I couldn't do it, she'd say, "Not can't, won't." Well, I'm sorry to say, it's not won't, it's can't and nor can most people. And, if I did wake up with a morning erection, she would be annoyed with me and accuse me of doing something. (Hello, morning erections are very common!)

After breaking up with my girlfriend, I was getting sexual desires, so, I wondered what could be done and rang up the line, and the nurse said that I could, if I wanted to, go to a bordello, or, I could masturbate. I figured that masturbation was cheaper and could be done in the comfort of my own home.

I remember, when I was in Year Eight, two or three boys in my year came to the school swimming carnival wearing t-shirts that said they were "W Watchers," and that they could spot one a mile away. And, I remember, when I was in Year Nine, I had to go to the toilet and a group of boys came and crowded around me and watched me, which was humiliating and perverse on their part!

Anyway, for me to be able to masturbate, I need to be able to have stimulus material but I don't need to look at porn, as what I find arousing you don't need to buy porn to see. I do believe that it should ALWAYS be consensual. I am attracted to women, and what I find arousing can be seen in that picture, and it's between the t-shirt and the knickers.

Masturbation does release feel good chemicals and the moment of release is where it builds to a crescendo and you feel good.

What I have said to parents who mention they have teenagers who masturbate is, yes, masturbation is an act of self-love and one that feels good, and as long as they do it in the privacy of their own bedroom, and they do not access material that they shouldn't, and they do not take photos of people without their permission, then, no harm done.