I remember, when I was 12, a girl in my class at school looked at me and told me, "Peter, you're gay!" I more easily meshed with girls than I did boys, and I was not interested in typical male pursuits.

I remember, when I was 14, after a group of men in Adelaide, South Australia, were on the news over brutal murders of young men, my mother told me that I needed to be more masculine as I would attract such people. I also remember, the following year, I wanted to go to university to do some research for an assignment, and my mother told me that I couldn't go by myself because the gays might find me attractive. Three years later, my mother was disgusted because she suspected that a young male hairdresser found me attractive and was eyeing me off while I was talking to her outside a supermarket.

I mesh more easily with females than males, but I have never found men attractive. I started on estrogen therapy just under six months ago, and even before then, I would see myself in the mirror and think, "No, I want to shave my face as i don't like seeing whiskers." That's not auto gynephilia; that's just me liking clear skin. Since I have started HRT (I take a testosterone blocker twice a week, and my testosterone level is undetectable at less than 0.5) my skin has been softer and smoother and clearer, I have developed some breast tissue, and I feel happier.

Even after this time, I do not find men attractive. In fact, I often see women with men and think, "What does she find attractive with him? I don't find the goatee beard attractive, or whatever else." I find women attractive, however, but I would need to be more set in how I present to be able to have a relationship with one, and I don't want a butch lesbian.