I could have written this myself. I remember, when I was eight, I happened to put this particular hat on and my father said that I would have made a pretty girl. I remember my dysphoria setting in at school whenever we had boys against girls, and I'd either have to fight to suppress it or go the opposite way.

I remember when I was twelve, and I had asthma, a pulmonologist told me that I would have to develop a chest. I remember this pulmonologist wanted me to see a cardiologist for fear that I had Marfan's Syndrome, and that cardiologist noticed I had a curvature of the spine. He sent me for an x-ray, and years later, I was to discover that I have wedging of several vertebrae. I resisted attempts by my family to get me to lift weights and the like. I have an hourglass figure (shoulders broad, slim waist and come out again as I come down to my hips). I remember my mother, when I was 24, saying to me, "Look at your skinny waist!"

A couple of weeks ago, I saw my GP, and she is the only GP I've had in 47 years whom I've liked, and I said to her that while I liked the doctor who diagnosed my ankylosing spondylitis (I first saw him when I was 23, in March of that year, and he died in September that year), after he died and she bought the practice, I could finally be my true self. I had never really felt comfortable with male doctors, but there have been a few exceptions. And there was one female doctor I wouldn't let touch a valve stem cap on my car's tyre, let alone manage my health. She was a complete horror. I know my GP has a couple of transwomen (I've seen them in her waiting room) as patients and I am confident she could add one more (me).

As an autistic, I have never really gelled with neurotypical males (I could with some autistic males, but I can better relate to women). I have no interest in football, which many of the boys I went to school with found weird.

I remember I first read about a transwoman when I was 14, whose name was Judy Cousens. I might have commented something at the time, but her path was one I secretly wanted to follow. I have wanted to at various points, and I now say, at approaching 48, I have been living my true autistic life and now it's time to deal with the next thing, transitioning my gender. I'm not planning to wear a lot of make-up, and my clothing style will be mainly polo shirts and jeans or shorts, like I do now, and flannelette shirts in winter. I go for comfort more than anything else.