I agree with you. It's almost like, from the era of my youth, a grandfather who was a Pacific War veteran who hated Japanese, but didn't talk about it very much, and their grandson or granddaughter is studying Japanese at school and the grandparents are over for dinner and they excitedly announce that they'll be hosting a Japanese exchange student for three weeks, and the grandfather says, "I'm not a lover of them." But then, the grandparents come over when the exchange student is there, and they're actually quite nice to the student. The grandfather is allowed his point of view, but one of three things might have happened in the meantime. One, the parents might have said, "Do you realise what you've just done? You could be more diplomatic." The grandmother, on the way home in the car, might have said something similar to the grandfather and they decided to make an effort, or the grandfather might have thought, "Even if I faced the student's grandfather, or their grandfather's generation down the barrel of gun, it wasn't the student's fault or even the student's grandfather's fault."

The only time when I consider someone a time waster is if a person says, "Non-smoker," and a smoker answers. If the person says, "Non-smoker preferred," that's a bit different. But then again, some smokers will have their first cigarette upon waking up, and smoke a packet and a half a day. Some might have two cigarettes every fourth Friday night when they catch up with their friends for a drink.

A person is allowed to find sexually attractive whatever body shape they like, but what people need to remember is, you can say, "I want somebody who's over 6 feet tall, solid build, bearded," but there could be someone who's 5'8", slim build, clean shaven, who's perfect for them.